Mr. Kinda Right vs. Mr. Right on Time

I don't have to write this, but I have to write this as I feel it's important to share my little bit of learning with others. My 2 best friends and I had a 'bet' in high school. Who would get married first, who would have kids first, etc. I was deemed the one who would never marry and certainly have no children. 16 years later I surprised all and finally married. They used to call me the runaway bride. I was quick to bolt from relationships for a number of reasons. The number one factor in my decision to call it quits was always an overwhelming sense that I could do better and an unwillingness to 'settle'. I am in no way implying the relationships I had prior to meeting my husband were with 'bad' or faulty people. Only not the right person for me.

I had maintained short and long term relationships with the kinda a right but not quite right people and made the best out of them but in hindsight realize i had it all wrong. What I have come to realize is the reason I had spent so much time with kind of rights is because I was not in tune with myself and my spirit enough to even know what I needed. I was blessed to have a friend and mentor intervene and introduce me to my future husband. Who, truth be told had I not of been introduced to through a trusted friend I would of avoided like the plague. OMG! Not a creative....not the music industry... Not one of THEM! We would talk for hours and after every conversation I'd get off the phone thinking wow. He 'gets' me. But was still so self brainwashed refused to put 2 and 2 together even while this man was doing EVERYTHING I had always wished my partner would do. He cared when he had no reason to, was responsible, committed, had a strong faith, and most of all. Appreciated me for me, not who he or I thought I should or could be.

I'm rambling. Let me get to the point. I've got quite a few people out there 'looking' for Mr. Right and then all bent out of shape when they turn to Mr. wrong. My little advice is that

you don't have to LOOK for Mr. Right. Instead look to make yourself right and Mr. Right will find you.

I think we all may carry a warped sense of self which can cause chaos in relationships. Folks have noted how well my husband and I 'fit'. I believe it is because we appreciated each other as is. I love him as him and vice versa. Not, well if we stay together long enough maybe he'll change or, I can change him. AS IS! If you have to ask, "is he/she the one?" they are probably not. The difference between kinda right and just right is so obvious. You will laugh at yourself for entertaining all the not quites prior to. Love yourself and love will come to you. Also, don't be afraid to step outside your comfort zone.

The right one may be packaged differently than what you think is right. Don't be afraid to ask God for guidance. Have faith your God will not thrust you into chaos. If you are so busy looking, you may miss who and what God has put in place for you. Stop 'looking' for him. Look at you, love you and when your right one arrives, you will have so much more to share. Not some beat down tractor trailer full of baggage toting train wreck. A receptive, refreshed and refreshing woman. You don't want someone to complete you. You need to be whole first. You need someone to complement you an the 2 of you are that much stronger. TOGETHER. And those at my thoughts for the evening. I am thankful for the blessing I have received in my husband. I couldn't of dreamt a better life.

For those looking. Have faith. God will give you what you need when you are ready to receive it. In the meantime. Love the one you're with (you).